I don't know what it is about the animal health industry, but the characters within it are priceless. Maybe it's the wit of salespeople in general, (present source definetely not included) or perhaps it's the multitude of people we are around that lends to the funny bone. One of the best characters and most genuine people I have ever known is Jack Rudnay. Jack owns Stone Manufacturing in Kansas City, MO, a veterinary instrument company.
I met Jack for the first time at The Armadillo Classic, a vendor/distributor golf tournament that unfortunately lasted only a few years. Distributor and manufacture reps got together for a few days of golf and letting their hair down. Kelly Wilkie and I had recently gone to work for SunWest and this long weekend was highly deserved after about 5 or 6 months of trying to establish ourselves in new territories. Jack was one of the first people we were introduced to. I remember he was sitting down on a couch in the hospitality room and when he stood up, I was a little intimidated to say the least. Jack was about 6' 4", bearded and had a loud booming voice. I came to find out he played football for the Kansas City Chiefs back in the 70's. The intimidation factor soon wore off and I found out what a hoot this guy was. After the blue jokes and wisecracks were over, Jack was a great guy who really wanted to get to know the people he did business with. I was about 6 months from getting married and he sincerely asked about Susie and wanted to know more about the two of us. I think the last time I saw him, he asked with that big voice of his, "How's that bride of yours doing?" He's never met Susie in his life. And if I have anything to do with it, he will never meet her. Just kidding Jack.
Jack told us a hilarious story about playing for the Chiefs. At the time, Hank Stram was the head coach at Kansas City and Jack was an All-Pro center. From my recollection, I remember Jack telling us that Coach Stram observed practices from an elevated platform about 50-100 feet above the practice field. He would watch the scrimmages and voice his thoughts and opinions through a bull horn down to the players. Jack said there was a young, hot shot rookie quarterback that had become a bit of a pain in the ass to the veteran players. Jack told us he got a little tired of the rookie showing his ass and thought up a way to bring him back down to size. Jack cut away his football pants so that there was an opening when he bent over to hike the ball. While Jack was standing, it was unnoticeable, but when he bent over to hike the football, the opening was just large enough for the quarterback to slip his unsuspecting hand into Jack's nether-regions.
Coach Stram hollered from above to run a particular play. The whole offensive line was in on the joke and they all bit their lips at what was about to happen. The offense broke huddle and jogged to the line. Jack bent over to hike the ball and as the egotistical QB reached down the back of Jack's legs to take the hike, his hands felt something that he wasn't expecting. You guessed it, the hot shot QB was introduced to beans and franks. The rookie pulled his hands back in a hurry and jumped back several feet. Coach Stram picked up his bull horn and hollered down at the team, "What the hells going on down there? Get back in there and run the play!" Jack stood up and looked back at his unknowing accomplice, shrugged his shoulders and shouted up at the coach,"I don't know what the problem is coach. The kid won't take the snap." It wouldn't surprise me if that was the day the shotgun formation was invented.
