Who had the biggest impact on your life, mom or dad? Tough
question, huh? I would hate to get backed into a corner and have to answer this
one.
One of my best friends growing up recently lost his mother.
I cannot begin to imagine what that could do to my world, not to mention my
buddy’s world. I don’t know if it was a long struggle or something sudden, but
never the less, I don’t know if I am ready for that scenario to happen to me.
Most moms are around more than our fathers are because most dads’
work. I can’t think of anyone of my friends who had a “Mr. Mom” or stay at home
dad. My mom shuttled us to baseball practice and took us to the swimming pool
and then went home and cooked dinner. I never realized how hard it is to work
all day and then come home and cook dinner, until I moved out on my own and then
had to face cooking a meal after a long day at work. Pizzas became a staple in my diet at that
junction of life. Mom was around us more
and saw us grow up more than my dad did. No shot against my dad, but he was the
breadwinner and he had his work to do.
One of my dad’s chores at home was discipline. Mom took care
of it until I had grown big enough to laugh at her when she popped me with the yardstick.
Big mistake on my part. If I had just faked a few tears, life would have been
much less painful. As I got older, mom just gave up on the spanking and found a
new way to set me straight. How many of
us remember your mother saying, “Just wait till your father gets home!” The words give me a chill to this day. I
remember sitting in my room agonizing over the incredibly slow clock that
seemed to tick my life away, while I waited my fate. Reminds me of Richard
Pryor talking about how his grandmother would make him cut a switch for his own
whipping. He said, “ If I brought back too small of a switch, my grandmother
would get the whole tree.” I thought I had it tough….
Dad was probably more of an encourager than mom was. Not a
bad thing, but its probably a guy thing. My sister would probably say the same
thing about our mom. My dad liked me to play sports and encouraged me and my
brother to a point. I’m pretty lucky, because some of my friends did not get
that from their dads. The games of catch are etched in my mind forever. He even
tried to ride motorcycles with me, but flipped my bike when he tried to ride it
and never attempted again. Ha, funny remembering him say, “I got this!”, and
then land on his back. Sorry pop, but it was pretty hilarious.
Mom was there when my dog died when I was in college. She listened
to me bawl like a lost calf and helped me to move past it. Dad was there when I
failed in California the first time I lived there. He helped me get on my feet again and gave me
someone to talk to. They both gave me a piece of their mind the first time I
came home drunk on a Saturday night. Both of them had their place and time in
my life.
You’ll never get me to pick one over the other. I don’t want
them coming back with the tree.
